Proxemics

PROXEMICS – HOW WE USE SPACE

By Jill Bremer, AICI, CIP

Bremer Communications

There are three ways in which we communicate with others - verbally, in written form, and nonverbally. Nonverbal communication includes gestures, eye contact, posture, facial expressions, listening skills and the use of space. Skillful communicators know how to use space to their advantage. They are able to influence the behavior of others and “read” the messages others send to them through their use of space. Proxemics is an often-overlooked form of communication, but an important concept to master in the business world.

Interpersonal Space

U.S. Americans generally divide personal space into four distinct zones. The Public Zone starts at about twelve feet from the person and stretches back to the limits of sight. The Social Zone reaches from four to twelve feet. The Personal Zone range is from two to four feet. The Intimate Zone stretches from zero feet to two feet away. When people are not aware of these zones and the meanings attached to them, violations may occur. The result is tension and suspicion. We’ve all felt uneasiness in the movie theater, elevator or airplane when the stranger on either side inadvertently touches us. Our personal bubble of space has been invaded and we feel uncomfortable and resentful.

Most U.S. business relationships begin in the Social Zone. As the relationships develop and trust is formed, both parties may subconsciously decrease the distance to the Personal Zone without any uneasiness. Managers and co-workers who enter the Personal Zone too quickly risk conflict and distrust. When a space violation happens, the “victim” often develops a feeling that things are not quite right but can’t put their finger on the cause. Attention then shifts to the other person and their behavior and away from the conversation. The result is often a complete breakdown in communication.

Personal zones of space vary from culture to culture. When U.S. Americans interact with people from other cultures, they need to be aware of how the other parties view space. Low-contact cultures (North American, Northern Europeans, Asian) favor the Social Zone for interaction and little, if any, physical contact. High-contact cultures (Mediterranean, Arab, Latin) prefer the Intimate and Personal Zones and much contact between people. Misunderstandings can occur when these two groups interact and either invade or avoid space and contact. Violations can also occur between people of the same culture. Differences in personality can lead to different interpretations of personal space and touching. The solution lies in being able to read others’ styles and level of flexibility.

Seating Arrangements

Our choice of seats is another area of proxemics to consider. Where we sit in relation to other people can aid or hinder communication. A comfortable and relaxed arrangement for two people at a table is to sit corner-to-corner. This allows for maximum eye contact and other nonverbal signals, a good arrangement for cooperative work. In a side-by-side arrangement, body language is difficult to read and physical proximity is close. This position works when both parties need to focus on the task at hand and not on each other. Across-the-table positions are common in competitive situations. Nonverbal signals can be closely monitored and the table provides a safe barrier. Unintentional conflict can also develop between two people who sit across from each other.

People who need to work independently may choose to sit across from each other but not directly opposite. This kind of seating provides a kind of isolation that allows both parties to concentrate on their work. In a group setting, the head of the table is usually reserved for the leader of the group. That seat brings with it a sense of power, status and influence.

Territory

Human beings are territorial animals and like to protect and control their space. Have you ever felt angry when you re-entered a meeting and found “your” seat taken by someone else? Have you felt offended when a co-worker or boss entered your office without knocking or when you discovered him pawing through your file cabinets? The territories we stake a claim to at work give us a sense of permanence and control. When that territory is invaded without permission, feelings of loss and anger are the result. People value their privacy and personal territory at work. Honor the space and belongings of others and you’ll enjoy working relationships filled with respect and trust.

Jill Bremer, AICI, CIP, owner of Bremer Communications, offers training, consulting and coaching in professional image development, communication and presentation skills. Her clients include Oracle, Abbott Labs, W.W. Grainger, U.S. Department of Energy and the National Association of Realtors. She can be reached at 708-848-5945 or at www.bremercommunications.com